Hello! I’m Chester Tanyeo, I’ve written four books, and this is my blog. [ Follow me on Facebook, Twitter, DeviantArt and Kiva. ]

[ My Books! ] [ Stories: Short stories, The Canon, Witch-Girl (Read from the bottom of the list) ] [ Poetry: All Poetry; ( ♥ ) ( ⚔ ) ]

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Edison Chen Part VI + Cheap Seduction Tricks
♠ 12 Aquarius 2k8, Tyr's Day ♣

Having watched Cecilia Cheung on Ch8 on New Year’s Eve, I have come to the conclusion that she has three looks – normal, happy and shocked. She looks shocked when angry. She looks shocked when sad. She must be looking absolutely stunned since the scandal broke.

After the photos came out, there was some talk of possible coercion and/or drug use, vis--vis her stoned look in pictures of her.

Now that the entire series of her in a police uniform has been released (hot!), and those few pictures of her laughing look unposed in an NG-kinda way (NG means “No Good", its HK movie code for “Outtake” or “Blooper"), I have decided that her stoned look isn’t drug-induced. It is, in fact, not merely intentional, but meant to be sexy.

Thus we now know that Cecilia’s range is 25% wider than previously imagined! All we need is a role which requires her to look sexy, and we can see her looking stoned.

Steven Lim, national embarrassment, did a Chris Crocker for Edison Chen. The thing about this is, Chris Crocker, when not going emo over Britney, is actually pretty cool. Steven Lim is just sad. At least Paris has the decency to show some pussy when attention whoring.

In a moment of terminal boredom, I actually watched Steven Lim’s video, and, this is the worst bit of it all, for someone who wants to be an actor, he’s acting is actually worse than Edison Chen’s. It’s not worth watching. It’s not funny. It’s just sad.

Pictures of Maggie Q were released and subsequently exposed as fakes.

Gillian Chung, at the annual CNY Twins event, came out and admitted it was her (like duh), and called herself “naive and stupid”. Awww. That’s what we love about you, Gill.

Jackie Chan might be involved. Word has it that in one of the videos, Edison asked whoever if he was “Better than Jackie Chan”, or something thus.

“Better than Jackie Chan” sounds like something 6 year-old kids aspire to.

“Mommy mommy, am I better than Jackie Chan?”

“Sure you are. You’re a big boy now.”

This is Part VI because the Avian God already did a post on his Duck Domain, which serves as Part V.

Then the guy moves on to the “love” stage. That’s when the guy is really concerned about the girl and makes sure that she gets the best and is really happy. Now since no guy would ever say that he’s the best for the girl, he’d move into this cyclic thing when he starts thinking that there will be someone else better for her

Not sure who wrote this, but I cut-and-pasted it since I laughed out loud when I read it, and that doesn’t happen a lot.

I’d say I’m the best for the girl. I’m not only best for her, I’m also best for her cute best friend.

In fact, any guy who thinks that he isn’t the best for the girl, not only isn’t the best for her, he isn’t even a guy. By definition, being a guy requires a penis.

And to preempt the cries of “you insensitive bastard,” etc – I am very sensitive. If you know where to lick.

idyll has a post saying saying pretty much what I said about the Taiwan mocking Singlish thing, in a less interesting way without being mean. Importantly, she points out that we actually have Singlish spellings of certain words.

Marina does a marvelous job of teaching you how to say “jelak”. It is very important that you know this. “Jelak” is a fundamental word, since English has no equivalent.

Sheylara posted a student video. I wouldn’t bother linking it except for three things –

     ♥ Sheylara is hot.
     ♥ This is exactly why I hate films. Notice only the arty make “films”? The good stuff are all called “movies”. Or “sex tapes”.
     ♥ There’s this bit in between where she moves her hand to below her neck. Ehrm, it’s a bit hard to describe. Sort of like playing with your necklace, except she wasn’t.

Which brings me to Cheap Seduction Tricks.

Cheap Seduction Tricks

  1. Play with your necklace. This draws attention to your neck. As we all know, models stretch out their head to make their necks look longer. Playing with your necklace is less prone to strain.
  2. Watch an action movie. People mistake the adrenaline released while watching people run in tension-filled situations for attraction.

I’d write more, but I that’s all I can remember. Note that this is all theoretical. I’m more manly than the Rock as Batman cursing God in a thunderstorm. On a hill. Thusly, I’ve never had to bother with these because girls just drop to their knees and reach for my pants when they hear me say the alphabet backwards. This leads to some soul-searching when done in public areas.

Q: When I last interviewed you in May 2001, I asked you what concerned you most about the next 10 years, and you replied, “an Islamist bomb, and mark my words, it will travel.” Four months later, we had Sept. 11. Secondly you said, “China and India’s challenge to the global status quo.” Do you still have the same concerns about the next 10 years?
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Kosovo Goes Indie. Smacktalking Serbia Promises Beatdown
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18 Aquarius 2k8, Moon's Day
RIP, 90DayJane
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17 Aquarius 2k8, Sun Lord's Day
Edison Chen Part VI + Cheap Seduction Tricks
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12 Aquarius 2k8, Tyr's Day
About Me
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11 Aquarius 2k8, Moon's Day
Gamasutra Interviews Lord British
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11 Aquarius 2k8, Moon's Day
How do people this stupid not inadvertently drink drain cleaner?
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10 Aquarius 2k8, Sun Lord's Day
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